Hadouken!

Politicians, environmentalists, citizens of Mother Earth, gather round for some important news: base.ad has discovered the world’s first truly renewable energy source. This scientific breakthrough revealed itself during a recent atomic demonstration at The Astoria. It was shown that with just the right quantities of 7-Up and Day-Glo, every teenager on planet Pop has the potential to power the entire European community. The first step is to simply fasten an electroconductive device to each youngster. The second is to introduce high levels of radioactive rave and grime. The explosive reaction produces gigantic measures of heat and kinetic energy, both of which can then be harnessed.

The level of anticipation was akin to that of the day before summer holidays, leading to all Dads and journalists taking safety on the upper balcony. Even before Hadouken! entered the arena, Late Of The Pier’s heavy doom-synth support resulted in a cascade of fluorescent colour being lauched towards the stage. It’s fair to say the kids were hysterically excited. And quite rightly, too.

The sold-out show amounted to only 45 minutes in running time, but any longer and Chernobyl would’ve looked like a picnic. In a room so hot even the air conditioning was sweating, Hadouken! appeared to the sound of sirens, useful in drowning out the high-pitched wails of their audience. Beginning with an assault on the mainstream - ‘The Bounce’ - the GameBoy geeks raced along at breakneck speeds, determined to make the wheels fall off. James Smith’s savage but sonic lyricism was flaunted in the Aphex-cum-Dizzee ‘Liquid Lives’ and the Sex Pistol anti-style rant of ‘Superstar’. With each passing moment someone’s life was in danger.

The pixelated punks lost their crowd, very briefly, during a crash test of new material. Smith opted to sing in showtune style, whilst his band did a synth rock impression of Europe stuck in ‘The Final Countdown’. Nevertheless, the lull gave medics the opportunity to extract the bodies of those that had perished in the carnage.

Singalong favourite ‘Tuning In’ and new single ‘Leap Of Faith’ brought the crowd back to a mere stampede. And only moments before they departed for bed - they all had school in the morning - the crowd endured the accelerated square bass lobotomy of ‘That Boy That Girl’, which would’ve made even The Prodigy cry.

It’s a little over a year since Hadouken! played their first ever gig. For a band that doesn’t even have an album release yet, this was testament to the capacity of the internet. Hadouken! and their generation have embraced one another with fierce DIY aspirations. That, plus the wear fluoro like they invented it.

Powerful stuff.